It was very liberating for me because I was like, "It's okay for me to feel at odds with my body, but not necessarily feel so at odds that I need to transition and live in a different body and live as a man." I can live as a lady-man or whatever. And that there are people that are trans and decide to transition and there are people that don't. Now I understand that other people feel the same way and that it's gender dysphoria. And I made a decision that I felt equal parts enough to just stay who I am.
I started understanding that this thing that I have in me is not unique and that so many people feel at odds with their body. When I got to a certain point, I just honored the female part of me too. And I struggled so much when I was really young of wanting to be a boy.
#INDIGO GIRLS FREE#
They were in a different generation and it was like, "Oh my God, I feel so free now to be able to articulate this."ĪR: I felt so not at home in my body. I was older and I had not even talked about it. I didn't know what my gender dysphoria meant. In my 30s or 40s, I might've been more like, "Yeah, I'm gay, but let's hang out and sleep together and have fun." I would have been a little more like, "It doesn't have to be so strict." When I met The Butchies, I didn't have a good analysis of genderqueer type stuff. I love you and I'm attracted to you, but I think that this is not our destiny. And I really was in love, but he wanted to marry me and I said, "I can't, I'm gay. During the time that I had a girlfriend, at one point we were separated and I had a boyfriend. JM: Did you assume at that point that she was also gay?ĪR: It's funny because things were a little freer than that. I was just going through this real struggle with my body and my sexuality and everything. I was going through so much and she was kind of wondering like, "What was I going through?" Because I was getting more radical and I had some problems with depression and I was a cutter sometimes. She wasn't yet aware that she was gay.it was tender. I think we were at a Wendy's or something eating some food before we played and I remember talking about it to her.
#INDIGO GIRLS HOW TO#
I didn't even know how to describe it, honestly.
We didn't talk about me being gay necessarily. Jeffrey Masters: When did you and your bandmate, Emily Saliers, come out to each other?Īmy Ray: God, I feel like it was unspoken at first.
#INDIGO GIRLS FULL#
Listen to the full podcast interview on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. On this week's episode of the LGBTQ&A podcast, Amy Ray joins us to talk about the lasting legacy of "Closer to Fine," identifying as genderqueer, and reflects on what was going on behind-the-scenes before coming out publicly in the '90s. More than any other band, it is their music that the queer community keeps returning to again and again. And thank God, right? Their storytelling ability is unmatched there are not two better musicians out there who know how to work together to create what can only be described as magic. The pair, Amy Ray and Emily Saliers, soon formed their band, Indigo Girls, and now more than 35 years later, they're still making music, both together and separately. It was always about, 'This feels amazing.' It was like, 'This is the most fun I've ever had. They were in her parent's basement learning cover songs - she's pretty sure their first was "A Junkie's Lament" by James Taylor - and she remembers thinking, "'This is amazing.' Not, we sound amazing. From the very first moment they started singing together, Amy Ray felt like her head was going to explode.
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